Although I wrote this one several weeks ago, it's still extremely relevant to me and I don't know why. I had a meeting about my evaluations and those same feelings all came up again. Just what exactly is this voice trying to tell me? I'd like to know now, please...
I got my evaluations yesterday.
They were all good, as in the criticisms were constructive.
My teachers picked up on new things that I need to learn, which means they’ve either given up on my old bad habits or I’ve outgrown them.
My playwriting teacher had the longest, and most thought-provoking, evaluation.
I’m still processing, but so far I’ve already learned one thing.
I think I’m explaining.
Everyone else hears excuses.
I’m confused but I guess I’ll stop explaining things when they go wrong and just…
…accept the consequences.
Which for some reason I am reluctant to do.
Recalcitrant. Resistant. Rebellious.
I don’t understand but I think it’s true.
I don’t like it.
Rebel – renounce, or take up arms against, authority; revolt. L. re-again, bellum-war.
Recalcitrant – show resistance; refractory. L. re-back, calcitro-kick.
Refractory – unruly, obstinate. Unmanageable, perverse.
Reluctant – unwilling, disinclined. L. re-against, luctor-struggle.
Resistant – make opposition to, strive against. L. re-against, sisto-stand.