I Spoke Too Soon

Remember when I wrote about sugar a few weeks ago?  And I said that while I definitely had physical reactions to sugar (congestion, sore throat, etc.) I appeared not to react emotionally?

Yeah.

I spoke too soon.

I’ve since discovered that sugar gives me a flash of a good mood and then, the next day, turns me into an irritable bitch.

Dammit.

I told my mother this, and she laughed.  It’s bizarre to be able to relate about an addiction.

Yes, I said it.

I’m addicted to sugar.

I drink pop like an alcoholic drinks booze.  I crave chocolate to the point of distraction.  I sneak candy like a boozer would sneak a gulp of vodka.

I would say I hate it, but I’m still getting used to the fact that it’s even true.

I’d say that it’s different from alcoholism in that it’s a biochemical addiction, not an emotional addiction, but I don’t know enough about it to know if that’s true or not.  Talking to my mom, it sounds like once you get the biochemistry balanced the rest falls into place.  As she put it - “I just forgot to eat sugar.”  I can hardly believe it - forgot to eat sugar?  Seriously?

Wow.

The upside is that if my mom - who is a recovering alcoholic and a recovering sugar addict - can kick two addictions, I sure as hell can kick one.

The sugar addicts program only has 7 steps too.

My problem is that I want to do all 7 steps at once.  I asked my mom how long it took her to do all 7.  She said, “About a year and a half.”

Dammit.

She said I’m not the first one to look at the list and say, “I can do all that starting next week!”

She also said not to cut sugar cold turkey; to start by reading The Sugar Addict’s Total Recovery Plan; and to be gentle with myself.  Heaping judgement on my head won’t help me heal my body.

So that’s what I’m going to do.

Starting today.